Am I a terrible person? Sigh. Do i deserve this? Maybe. Am I trying to redeem myself in your eyes? Yes.
The entirety of it all, makes it all confusing. Now, the final stage is set. I have to decide. To make a big deal out of this or not? Since I have decided that friendship is better for now, I have to stop. Stop being available. Stop getting all excited for nothing. Stop expecting more.
A sadness came over me but I know that this too shall pass. I know that I have to value myself more. I can be a friend but unless by some miracle that you begin to actually care and make an effort, I have to be firm in my decision.
My heart is not yet that settled but I’m partly glad you have gone back to the norm. I will do the same.
The most that I can do is no longer worry. I just pray you’ll be okay and be happy. That’s it.